Bonding Time

My wonderful mom got a new chair this last weekend and donated this one to us. It was my favorite chair all growing up - and it will have a permanent home at our place, as long as I live and it doesn't fall apart. It's just right. So this morning me and little Sommerfeldt spent a few minute just rocking and enjoying each other's company... as if we don't spend enough time together already... like... 24 hours a day :) Based on all the kicking and wiggling and squirming I think he enjoyed it. 

Last week we had a second ultrasound with a specialist at the hospital. We were excited because we heard that the hospital ultrasound machine makes even better pictures than the one at the clinic. That is true only when your little boy is not "active and uncooperative." He did his best to hide from the ultrasound machine and move as much as possible so as to blur all the pictures. That's our boy :) Everything is still looking great and as far as they can tell at this stage, he's perfectly healthy and developing normally.

While getting quilt fabric at JoAnn's, I saw this fleece and simply couldn't resist. We are doing a jungle theme in the baby's room (as much as you can in a small apartment where baby's room has to double as office and storage, too) and so this fabric was absolutely perfect. I can't wait to lay him down in the middle.

Last of all, I borrowed some of Ryan's homework time and we hit a few yard sales on Saturday. We bought a few outfits in all different sizes and I don't really plan to buy much more because I really don't know what I'll need or how much - we definitely still need pants and probably more of everything but I really have no idea. These outfits here my mom got for us - complete with both elephants and turtles on them :) but my absolute favorite is the polar bear sleeper. Ryan has polar bear pajamas too and they can match :) I got size 0-3 month since I don't know how big he'll be - and I sure hope he grows into them fast so I don't have to wait too long! 

20 week ultrasound!

The long-awaited and much-anticipated day finally arrived, and we got to see our little baby in ultrasound format!

Baby looks a lot different than the little blob we saw at 9 weeks! He has a nice symmetrical brain, a strong-looking four-chambered heart, two kidneys, a stomach, a bladder, a nice even spine, a rib cage, two arms, two legs, two hands, two feet, and a nose. He also has eye sockets that make him look a little halloween-ish on the ultrasound, since it only picks up bone and such and not cute skin features. We'll have to wait for delivery to see him in person. And we absolutely cannot wait!

And, in case you couldn't guess from the pronoun usage in this post, little Sommerfeldt is also a boy! We are overjoyed. Someone should have been there taking pictures of the look on our faces because I think it's a moment neither of us will ever forget. We can't wait to meet our little son in person and watch him grow up and see the person he turns out to be. Right now, we couldn't possibly be happier!

Almost halfway...

Today I spent a few minutes looking at these and feeling excited :) Only one more week until we have our ultrasound to hopefully see a happy, healthy baby and find out if it's a boy or a girl! I can hardly wait. I don't have any idea if it's going to be a boy or girl - and I honestly don't have a preference. I'm just excited to see the new little person who's going to join our family. 

Becoming a Mother

I read this quote on a friend's blog today and had to share - because it spoke to me, too.

"The most difficult part of birth is the first year afterwards. It is the year of travail - when the soul of a woman must birth the mother inside her. The emotional labour pains of becoming a mother are far greater than the physical pangs of birth; these are the growing surges of your heart as it pushes out selfishness and fear and makes room for sacrifice and love. It is a private and silent birth of the soul, but it is no less holy than the event of childbirth, perhaps it is even more sacred."

For me, becoming a mother is the most exciting and frightening thing that I have ever done. It's a life-changing event that in my life can be compared only to marriage in the scope of its impact - but with marriage, I already knew Ryan. I got to date him, be friends with him, "practice" if you will, before the actual change.

With parenting, there is no "practice" phase. There is only real life. From the moment that I knew this baby was coming to our family, our lives changed. My life changed. My whole perspective and plan changed, because now it is real. It's no longer hypothetical or hoped for; it's real, and there is no going back, and we would never ever want to. I am a mother now, even though our child hasn't even been born yet. I will always be a mother, forever, because that child is a part of our family now.

I worry all the time that something will happen to our little one, and I suppose that's the first step in my transformation into a mother, because I've been told you never really stop worrying. For the first time there is someone who is completely and totally relying on me. Our hearts are already beginning to connect in a way that only mothers can truly understand, and I am only beginning to understand it myself.

I am excited and scared and anxious and so, so happy all at the same time to be able to experience this new phase of life, to share it with Ryan, to meet our little one, to watch him or her grow and learn and become someone and to learn to love more than ever before because of this new experience. To love is truly the greatest joy and greatest pain that someone can ever experience. I am learning every day how great and encompassing the love of our heavenly parents for us must be. Someday I will be able to fully comprehend it - but for now, my transformation is still in process.

We love you, little Sommerfeldt!

Sixteen Weeks

This is me, minus the long green body and the many legs and the big green eyes.

I am so hungry, all the time. I take two lunches to work and it's still not enough. I'm munching my way through all the free snacks in the breakroom. Currently, little choo-choo's favorite foods are tomatoes, black plums, Sunny D, PB&J sandwiches with white bread, and Cheetos. And he/she doesn't appreciate peppers, chicken, or pasta with red sauce, although he/she is slowly regaining an appreciation for pickles (thank goodness! I missed them). Cooking without chicken has been interesting - I never realized how many of our favorite dishes are chicken dishes.

Little choo-choo - I've been thinking of him/her like that ever since we heard the heartbeat and it sounded like a train. I kept thinking of a little choo-choo train going around and around, and it made me laugh, which obscured the heartbeat... all in all not the most successful heartbeat session the midwives have probably ever seen :) hopefully this little one has a good sense of humor!

We got to go to the hospital to see our good friends' new baby (and them) last night, and it was fun walking through the mother/baby unit and thinking that will be us in less than six months!

Twelve Weeks

Food- it's amazing! Almost everything sounds good again, except pickles (except for the ones from Firehouse Subs...), whole wheat bread, and some pasta dishes (some of my favorite foods normally... ironic). The nausea is mostly gone unless I don't eat for too long, and then it comes back. Last night I waited too long to go to bed after eating and ended up eating baby carrots at the table at 11:30 at night so that I could feel better and go to sleep :) I can finally eat fruits and vegetables again and I'm working on re-implementing a good nutritional balance into my diet.

Sleep - it's all I want to do. Sooooooo tired all the time.... my whole body feels like it's disintegrating sometimes. While at our family reunion in Park City, I slept an average of 12-13 hours a day, with naps and sleeping in, and I was still tired all the time. There's not really anywhere to take a nap at work, so sometimes I'll go out and recline the seat in my car and turn on the AC and sleep for half an hour so I can function the rest of the day. I miss BYU and all the couches in the bathrooms!

Clothes - I'm not showing yet, but everything is getting tight. I attribute most of that to my extra-relaxed digestive system. Fortunately most of my jeans are too big in the waist regularly, so everything is fitting comfortably now. And my adorably cute summer pajama bottoms that I made in my sewing class don't fit at all :( I'm sleeping in Ryan's old basketball shorts from middle school. *sigh

I got just a few maternity clothes in Park City with my sister in law Michelle - I don't need them yet, but the dresses are super comfy and cool for the summer heat.


Baby stuff - we don't have any, other than clothes and a pillow from my sister in law. No need to buy anything yet. Our second bedroom is still full of furniture for sale, my sewing corner, and party equipment... If anyone has baby equipment they don't need anymore... let me know :) I'm only picky about the carseat and crib - anything else I have no preferences!

Only 6 more days in the first trimester, and we'll have our second appointment next week and see how everything is going!

Ten weeks!

Dear Baby,

Thank you for finally not making me nauseous all day long. Thank you for letting me open the fridge for more than 15 seconds. Thank you for letting me cook all morning and for letting me go out to dinner.

Thank you for letting me sleep through the night, or only wake up once. Thank you for letting me stay awake past 8 pm.

Thank you for liking water again. Thank you for always liking fruit. Thank you for not liking sugar as much.

Thank you for playing softball with me and scoring two runs. Sorry for embarrassing you that one time where I missed the ball. 

Thank you for listening to me while I vent about work and life and other things. Thank you for listening to me while I talk to you. Thanks for not judging me when I cry over everything.

Thank you for trusting me and Ryan enough to come to our family. Thank you for sticking it out and being patient with us while we're still figuring out how to be good parents. 

Thank you for coming to our family. We absolutely can't wait to meet you!